Snacks from the Land of Woes: Part VI (Sloth)

We're going into Lightning Round! Let's take this to the next level! GO!

There is another side to the River Styx. Where the wrathful writhe above its surface, the slothful lay submerged below. These were the lazy, the complacent. Those who could not be bothered to make the necessary provisions for survival. Now, too late, they know the horrors of their deeds as they lie helplessly beneath the chunky slop. Alukh and I learned the secrets of this riverbed of sorrows as we approached...

FIFTH CIRCLE OF HELL, PART TWO: HONG VAN'S GRASS JELLY DRINK

It seemed so calm and placid!



We read the ingredients. We thought it was enough. Why shouldn't it be? And beside the ominous "grass jelly" compound, it all sounded fairly kosher. Thus, Alukh bravely drank.



After the horrors of the white gourd drink, "not exactly awful" sounded like a dream. I reached for it and drank. And drank. And drank again.



But oh, if only we had read the fine print that said "shake before opening." There was something sinister lurking beneath the surface of this drink that we would not find until we poured it out. By that time, of course, we had drank half the can, having used it to calm our nerves between bouts with more trying items. If only we had known. IF ONLY WE HAD KNOWN.



Those weren't ice cubes in that label picture, those were despicable chunks of brown jelly blood-clot filth from beyond the grave! And yet, it serves us right for not reading the instructions. Laziness gets you nowhere but exactly that.

Once having crossed the Styx, we were now at the lower levels of Hell. The levels of active violence. Treachery, heresy, and murder. And companion olives. Stay tuned.