Snacks From the Land of Woes: Part III (Gluttony)

When we last left you, things were still going relatively well. There was a chilly wind in the pit of our stomachs, warning us not to go on into the jaws of Cerberus that certainly awaited us. But, being intrepid explorers in search of gastronomic redemption, we pressed on, and before we knew it we found ourselves plummeting into the...

THIRD CIRCLE OF HELL: PRESERVED MANGOES WITH CHILI

We should have stopped while we were ahead.



The box was so sweet and tender, all glassy and heart-shaped, all full of ponies and rainbows and fruits and shit. We should have known better. Evil works in treacherous ways to lure us into a horrible fate. In Dante's Inferno, the Third Circle is landmarked by a steady torrential rain of slimy vomit, a substance which bears more than a passing resemblance to the colour of the red chili-flecked mangoes. I guess we should have picked up on that.



But it wasn't until Alukh withdrew her fingers from her lips that we understood the full extent of the horror.



But wheresoever she goes in this journey, so must I. God damn it.



Our third round left us tingling, numb, and a little choked up. But though we were bloodied, we were not yet unbowed. The worst was still a ways off. At our next level of descent, we would come to an impasse of dissenting opinions, when we encountered the wicked and wily ways of the SEA CRUNCH SALT-AND-VINEGAR PRAWN SNACKS.