Conquering the Holidays: Part V (Rent and the Final Frontier)

Last week a few of us were planning a night out to see Rent after work. While hanging out in the framing room at the back of the store, diligently doing my job of avoiding actual work, when Carrie said to me "So did you bring another Jones Soda?!"



I said "You're crazy, Carrie! I've already made you suffer through two of them! My last one's chillin' in the fridge at home."
She said "For god's sake, woman, we're on a mission! Go home and get it on your lunch break!"

She sort of outranks me, as a key-holder.
So what else could I do? So drove home like the wind, and returned in record time.

STAGE FIVE: PUMPKIN PIE A LA CREMA FRESCA



Our oafish key-holder who doesn't want his good name spoiled by being mentioned on the internet (SPOILER: see panel below) was closing up shop with me that night, and was irritated that I let Carrie, Richard, and Janine in after doors were shut. I knew I had to do something to appease him, so I offered him some soda and told him he could be famous for daring and intrepid feats of glory. I likened it to Final Fantasy a little, and he ran to the bathroom to primp his hair and freshen up. I think it did a world of good, honest.



Weirder stuff at the Asian market? You don't say! Smells like a sequel to me!

Chi thanked me for the soda, then booted the lot of us out of the store to wait for my boyfriend to get there with ten minutes before the movie was about to start. Alone, cold, braving the elements, could we withstand the soda as well? Dun-dun-DUN!!!



"Eh, what the hell," we said. So we poured, and we drank. Well, they poured. I drank straight from the bottle on account of I'm classy like that.



[Editor's Note: Is that gold sequin belt not totally boss?!?]

But seriously, what the-- another decent soda?! (Albeit, in a weird creamy soupy sort of way.) I couldn't be alone in thinking it tasted like a different kind of gourd however, so I consulted my panel of experts.



But still, as always, we knew that nothing is truly known until we feel it burning in the backs of our throats like the aftermath of sick. Would this one be different? We didn't know, but we were going for the gold.



Well, we were all done with our experiment, but then Andrew showed up.Now, I absolutely adore the kid, and there's no way to show your love quite like offering a boy something weird to eat. He'd deftly sidestepped all the other flavours, but this time there was no escape. MUAHAHAHA-- I mean, je t'aime!!!



And with that we went to the movies, and I chucked the bottle by the wayside, and we rode off into the sunset on wild golden stallions, and thus ended an era. The era... of Jones Soda. Thank you all for reading, and good night!


El Fin.





...or is it?!